A “Dear John” letter to a Holy City

August 18, 2006 - 4:19 AM by Allison

Dear Jerusalem,

This is really hard for me to write, but it was time you knew. Things between us have not working out for some time, so I’m leaving you.

I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and I’ve just decided it’s time that I put down roots somewhere closer to the beachfront. Don’t blame yourself…it’s not you, it’s me. Tel Aviv and I have much more in common, and I hope that some day you find someone who’s particularly well-suited to your diversity and passionate–some would say “zealous”–enthusiasm for life. Me, I just want sand, surf and tall buildings so I can pretend I’m in New York and California at the same time. I want to be where the diplomatic action is, and live near my friends. So it’s time.

Wishing you all the best. You know you’re a great girl, and on some level, I’ll always love ya. But only as a friend. You know it’s probably best for both of us that way.

Keep in touch, girl!

Love,

Costa Rican Embassy

(That humorous take on today’s not-so-humorous news was brought to you by Jewlicious)

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