Why we are here . . . ?
Gils recounts a conversation quite familiar to any immigrant from an English-speaking country: the old “native Israelis do not undersand why anyone from a wealthy, comfortable Western nation would ever move to a war-ridden, poverty-ridden country like Israel.” One answers about one’s ideals, one’s desire to be with one’s people, to be part of Jewish history . . . and one gets a pitying look and a shrug in return.
I am sick of this conversation which I am translating into English;
“Tell me your Hebrew isn’t exactly 100%, Where are you from? America?”
“No, I am from Australia”
“Aaaah Australia! It is my dream to go to Australia! It’s very far away!”
“ I Know, it’s at the end of the world and then left.”
“Tell me? Why would you leave Australia? Isn’t life easier there?”
“Well I am a Zionist! I guess for the same reasons that you stay in Israel and don’t move there, I have come here.”
“ But, where is your family?”
“They are all there.”
“You are alone? You are crazy! Why would anyone want to leave Australia to come here?”I guess this conversation always leaves me slightly disconcerted. Maybe, because it forces me to question? Maybe, because I am not so happy with my answer? I reflect a bit more and realize that it is neither of those things…Maybe I just don’t want to be called crazy within the first minute of meeting someone, and have them pass negative judgement on a major life decision of mine…..no I’m not angry…I was angry when on my first day of work, I had to introduce myself to everyone and when I said I made Aliyah (go/rise up to Israel) last year, someone replied…What nonsense! You didn’t rise up to anything!…Maybe I just wish that the people that lived here, had a bit more pride. I guess I feel that these statements that they make are tinged with their personal disappointment in their experiences here…Maybe that is me passing my own personal judgement on them…I’d like to think that I am misjudging their motivation, but I don’t think I am, I almost feel like they are projecting the thought ‘Are you not grateful for all the opportunities that you had in Australia that we never received here and never will?’ perhaps this is stretching it..I don’t know…. However, for me having changed my life to be here having to have this conversation on a regular basis and re-iterating these thoughts on a regular basis…this makes me feel a bit I dunno….duller.
Yom Kippur: The difference between perfection & purification
I try to deal with the following article (from Aish Hatorah), appreciate it, “live it” – but still… find it difficult to absorb. Not to mention trying to be “spiritual” and introspective as the fast-induced nausea, vertigo, shakes and cold sweats take over as the day wears on…
Anyone out there have any ideas to deal with this? Thoughtful replies are most welcome.
This Yom Kippur, leave the guilt at home.
The venerable 19th century sage, Rabbi Yisrael Salanter, once asked an obvious question and offered a penetrating response. “Why did God choose to position Yom Kippur after Rosh Hashana? Yom Kippur is the Day of Atonement; Rosh Hashana celebrates God’s dominion over the Universe and the unique role that we, His Chosen People, play in that cosmos. Wouldn’t it be far more logical to enter that glorified state after we have undergone the spiritual refinement of Yom Kippur? It is actually very much the contrary, explained the wise rabbi. We don’t need to be totally purified to attain the exalted status of membership in the Heavenly Corps. We achieve that holy status just by being who we are — yes, with all of our blemishes and imperfections and weaknesses. It’s called being human.
Read more.
As for the physical needs, at least someone understands me…
(Cross-posted at Israel At Level Ground)
Quality of Life
Most people think of Israel as a place that Americans move to if they are idealistic and don’t mind being a little poor. After all, salaries here are comparatively low, and expenses (in proportion to the salaries) relatively high, so why would anyone with a good job in America give up the good life to live “idealistically” in Israel?
So I’ve been following with great interest the comments to a post by an American blogger. The blogger, Shifra, wrote:
Jewish Debt
No no, this isn’t some sort of metaphorical post about what the Jewish people owe to society or what society owes to the Jews. It’s about the cost of being frum (Orthodox) – and it IS expensive.
Today I was emailing with another blogger who said something like “Wouldn’t it be great if there was a blog where frum people could anonymously talk about their financial problems? I don’t think I look that different than any other man in shul but I’m up to my eyeballs in debt while everyone else seems to be doing just fine!” (OK I added the bit about the eyeballs but the rest is kinda, almost accurate.)
Well how about here? In the comments section?
You can use your real fake name, or make up a new even faker fake name!
See, Orthodox Jews in America have a little problem. On the one hand, they tend (in general) to earn relatively nice incomes. But there are certain high priorities which tend to eat up that income, most notably the tuitions at Jewish Day Schools. In a religious community for which Jewish Education — giving one’s children top exposure to Bible studies, Hebrew language, Talmud, Jewish theology, etc — is of utmost importance, most families, which tend to be large, will do whatever it takes to send all their kids to a private Jewish school (which may or may not provide a strong enough secular education to prepare the kids for good colleges). Those schools charge anywhere from 10-20 thousand dollars per year per child.
Then there are the mortgage payments. Orthodox Jews tend to live in urban and suburban centers, since they cannot drive on the Sabbath and therefore must be within walking distance of a synagogue. Living in an affordable home miles from an Orthodox synagogue is not an option.
Then there are taxes, and health insurance . . . throw in a not-insignificant culture (especially in New York and LA) that promotes life perks such as housekeepers, private nannies, annual vacations, Jewish summer camps, and nice clothes and jewlery . . . and you have a recipe for disaster (though most of the commenters claim not to buy any of those things . . . so who IS?). Most of the commenters, even those who earn well into the six figures, and even if they don’t buy all those perks, still have a hard time making ends meet. Very few have any savings, and they all complain about the high tuition rates.
Except for the ones who moved to Israel, such as this man, who point out that here, religious schools are highly government subsidized, health care is universal, college is almost free, and there is exceedingly little pressure toward conspicuous consumption:
Changed My Life Style said . . .
Have 6 kids, lived in NJ, had annual gross of 200K, gave 10% after-tax to tzdeka (charity), lived in a gigundus house with 15K property tax, 7K utilities, 3k landscaping, Let’s not forget the 40K in TUITION.
Found that whatever was left disappeared into a black hole. Annual grocery bill was 25K. Spent easily 10K per year on clothing.
We got caught in the cycle of doing what every one else was doing because you figure that’s the way that it’s supposed to be done.
Like everyone else, we were working like beasts-of-burden to support this life style. At the end of each day, there wasn’t an ounce of energy left to do anything. Felt like the life force was being sucked from my body.
Then, one day I saw that I was headed for an involuntary career change (restructuring, downsizing, whatever you want to call it).
I asked myself: How will I ever manage to feed the beast that we created?
Decided that it was time for a drastic life-style change.
Decided to sell the farm, pack up the bags and move everyone to Israel.
Bought the NJ house for 350K. Sold it for 700K.
Found a handyman special in a nice Anglo neighborhood here for 200K. Put 100K renovations into it. Put the balance of 200K in the bank, and now we have NO mortgage.
Arnona (property tax) is about $1500 per year. Utilities run $3000 per year because we like our air conditioning and heating. Own just one large family vehicle.
School costs including extra tutoring are under $10K.
We have the best health care system on the planet here and the supplemental upgrade policy costs $600 per year.
We have a small garden and now I cut the grass myself.
Now we spend just a few hundreds of dollars per year on clothing.
My grocery bill is down to the $15K/yr range, and yes, we do eat meat and we do a lot of entertaining on Shabbos.
We tossed the TV and that’s $50/month in savings right there.
Cell phones are cheap here too, we have 8 phones (one for every member of the family) on an Orange family plan and my monthly bill is under $100. Can’t do that in the US of A (as far as I know).
It’s amazing how in 3 short years, we’ve been de-programmed of that certain kind of Orthodox-Jewish-American mentality that we once had.
Gone are the times when the kids all got new clothes and shoes for Pesach and Rosh Hashana.
Gone is the notion that we will have to spend $30K per year per kid to give our kids “proper” college educations.
You know what? Our kids are getting great educations here, and they will find good work and professions, and they will be able to build families, and they will never feel that they lack anything.
Why? Because it’s all in the mind. What you think you need versus what you really need.
We are working hard since we moved here 3 years ago. That hasn’t changed.
What has changed is that from the time I say Modeh Ani in the AM until I say Shema at bedtime, I feel like I am actually LIVING MY LIFE.
I am no longer a slave to a job, a house, the shopping mall and school tuitions.
I am free, free at last!
And I think that the scenery is a lot nicer here too. And, not to rub it in too much, but I can daven at the Kotel whenever I like.
Thanks for listening and come and visit us soon!
Obviously many in Israel, especially native Israelis and immigrants from poorer countries, often do have a hard time financially. The poverty rate here is very high. And not all American immigrants “make it” either. But for many (not all) Western immigrants, what they lose in salary is more than made up for in quality of life. Food for thought.
The Midlife and the Restless

Liza is in the throes of a midlife crisis, and some serious career (in)decisions . . .
So I should be grateful, shouldn’t I? With all of these aspects in my favor, especially being able to spend so much quality time with my son, I should be happy. But I’m not. Nrg reckons I’m going through something akin to a midlife crisis, and perhaps I am. All I know is that I’m feeling terribly unsettled and unsatisfied, and I’m not sure what to do about it. Hi-tech no longer excites me as it once did, and I’m definitely feeling the pull of the ideology-based non-profit world. I’m tired of this sector, tired of the unpredictability, the frenzied work environment. I’m no longer enamored of the hi-tech work ethic, where the reigning attitude seems to be one of “we’ll compensate you well, work you to the bone, and suck your soul out until there’s nothing left.” Sounds irresistible, doesn’t it? I suppose for the young and ambitious, it probably does. Seeing as I’m neither (not that I’m old or completely lacking in ambition, mind you, just not chomping at the bit to make it to the top), I find myself wondering more and more what I’m doing here.
I am torn. I want to enjoy my work. I want to feel passionate about the things I do and write. And I want to be paid a decent wage for it, and not merely a pittance. Sadly, it seems that these ideals are mutually exclusive.
. . . . There has to be something that will satisfy both my soul and my bank account, though I have yet to figure out what it is. I’ve thought about freelance writing on the side, dipping my toes in the water, so to speak, but I’m not sure if there’d be any interest. I mean, clearly, I’m at least a decent writer, as I do have several regular readers, and have even been contacted by a few “real” publications interested in reprinting some of my blog entries (but more on that if and when it pans out…). Could I do it? Am I good enough? Would people be interested in what I have to say, interested enough to pay me? That remains to be seen.
Yom Kippur in Israel
Yom Kippur, the Day of Repentance, starts this Sunday night and runs through Monday evening. Per Israeli law, the country’s streets will be closed to traffic and a quiet white blanket will warm the land.
I recall a radio show on Erev Yom Kippur many years ago; the gist was this.
Here in Israel, it’s a few hours before Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the year. Stores, factories, restaurants, TV & radio stations, everything is shutting down, as of clouds of purity wash over the country. Dressed in white, the vast majority of the House of Israel go to shul, fast, and commorate Yom Kippur in some manner.
For 24 hours, there is no radio, no television, no food, and a rare harmony envelopes the land.
May we all be inscribed in the Book of Life.
See you next week.













