What, Another Holiday?

October 4, 2007 - 4:27 PM by Stephanie

You betcha. This time it’s Simchat Torah. Rejoicing of the Torah. One of the happiest Jewish calendar days.

Tonight in Israel there’ll be drinking and dancing in the streets and festivities all to mark the holiday (and celebrate the fact that on Sunday kids GO BACK TO SCHOOL!)

On the Upper West Side, My Urban Kvetch points out some of the things a person might look for this Simchat Torah:

– Ultra-Orthodox Jews peering down the block at mixed dancing-with-Torahs circles.

– Israelis on cell phones.

– A blind date who doesn’t remember you.

– People you knew in high school who ignore you when they see you.

– A thong. Or inappropriate shul cleavage.

– Getting pushed by people who don’t apologize, and having your toes pierced by a dancing stiletto.

– People “wearing” Israeli flags as mantles around their shoulders.

– A drunk guy, about to drop the Torah he’s holding in favor of the flask in his pocket.

– Non-Jews hanging out of their windows, spectating as the Jews dance in the streets.

– Scotch. Scotchy Scotch Scotch.

– Black, over the calf boots. Even if it’s 85 degrees. Because Simchat Torah is supposed to be in the fall, so we can all wear our black, over the calf boots.

Chag sameach!

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