Israel walks the line
For a long time, there was no word for ‘standing in line’ in Hebrew.
Just kidding, of course there was a word for it, it’s just that nobody actually stood in line. Nobody will actually stand behind you, they sort of sidle up next to you, as if they’re going to cut in front of you at the first available moment. Lines in Israel look more like trapezoids.
And never mind the people who come up behind you and say “I’m here behind you – I’m just going to do 10 errands and I’ll be right back.” These people alway have a knack of returning just after their turn was supposed to come and expect me to vouch for them, even though I’m done with my business and have one foot out the door.
In the last couple years though, a major innovation has rippled through the postal, government and health care systems – the number system! Everyone takes a number at the door and there’s no controversy, nobody holding someone else’s place, nobody arguing that they were ahead of you in line – right? Wrong.
Today at the neighborhood post office, the following scenario proves that Israelis can create havoc even out of an organized situation. Here’s the deal – lots of people are at the post office, one person who couldn’t wait any longer walked out, throwing his number into the trash can at the entrance.
A 20-something-year-old man who had just walked in, reaches in and picks up the discarded number, which is a couple dozen ahead of his own. A woman who sees the action going down and realizes Mr. 20-something is now ahead of her shouts out, “You can’t do that. I was here before you.”
“Sure I can,” he answered. “If the other guy had stayed, he’d still go ahead of you. What does it matter if it’s him or me?”
The woman didn’t like that response and approached one of the postal clerks – “Don’t receive this man – he’s cutting in line,” she yelled out. The clerk had no idea what she was talking about, but meanwhile, the other people in line all started weighing in with their opinions, some siding with Mr. 20 and some with the ruffled woman.
My wife, who relayed the story, was ahead of both of them, and walked out without getting to experience the final act. My bet is that just before it was Mr. 20′s found turn, someone ran up and said “I was here, I just went out to do 10 errands.”
Nostalgia Sunday – Elections in Israel, Part 1
Filed under: General, Israeliness, Nostalgia Sunday, Politics, Pop Culture
Let’s go back in time, shall we? The year was 1988. Israel still had only one television station but, then as now, was blessed with a multitude of political parties that, for the first time, were allowed to present their platforms on the air, thus providing the entire country with an evening’s entertainment. So there we sat, transfixed. Remember: there was only one TV station. Also, some of the ads were nothing if not amusing, especially if you go for Theater Of the Absurd.
This man, for example, from the “Quiet Party”, advocated getting rid of government stagnation and corrupt politicians by either voting for his party – symbolized by the ever-popular letter “zayin” – or putting in a blank ballot, or just not showing up at all.
The logic still escapes me but they look like a fun bunch, floating on the Dead Sea in their inner tubes.
But the most memorable catchphrase of 1988 was, without a doubt, “Noar, Noar, Noar” (“young folks” repeated three times), from the ad presented by Tarshish, a Netanya-based party headed by Nissim Douek. Although his party’s symbol was “zayin ayin mem” (there’s that zayin again!) — meaning “rage” — Douek seems more doleful than angry as he tells the country’s Sephardic youth they has been lied to by the government, then promises to found a university in Netanya.
To see all the election commercials from 1988, visit the Nana-Channel 10 portal.
Compare these clumsy awkward efforts of yesteryear with media-saturated today. Every political party, TV and radio station, has a YouTube presence. A good one is Channel 2′s Election 2009 channel, where Israelis (celebs, demi-celebs and non) sound off about… well, whatever.
It’s also important to keep up with weekly satire show Eretz Nehederet (Wonderful Country) which, having finished up with the war, now turns its attention to the elections.
Another fun online tool for keeping up with things is the Israel Democracy Institute’s 2009 Israel Election Compass. A joint project of IDI and Ynet , the Election Compass guides users through a series of questions that help them identify which political parties and Prime Ministerial candidates most closely reflect their views on Israel’s most pressing social, political, economic, and security-related questions. It’s amazing what you can learn about yourself in filling out these questionnaires. Apparently, I should vote Labor, although in fact, that wasn’t my plan.
The next prime minister of Israel – Dennis Ross?
Ross - Ammunition both for and against Bibi
With the major parties – Kadima and Likud – frothing at the bit after being held up due to the the ‘national unity’ displayed during the war in Gaza, they’re now finally unleashing the campaigns that their spin doctors and media specialists have been cooking up these last few weeks.
And, strangely enough, they’re using some of the same strategy, courtesy of a one-time aide to Bill Clinton who is set to make a comeback under President Barack Obama – Dennis Ross. The former Middle East negotiator, who’s expected to be appointed as US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s point man on Iran, was up to his elbows in the Israel-Palestinian issue during the 1990s and he knew all the players involved.
That’s why both Kadima and Likud are planning to use quotes from Ross’s published memoirs to both praise and bury Likud leader Bibi Netanyahu, according to Gil Hoffman writing in The Jerusalem Post.
“Bibi rarely seemed to know how to act on his ideas – how to present them, to whom, and even when to do so,” Ross wrote about Netanyahu in a quote from his book, The Missing Peace, that was distributed by Kadima. “Translating an idea into action seemed beyond his grasp. It was not lack of intelligence… it was the lack of judgment… but there was something more: Often he would come up with ideas simply to get himself out of a jam.”
The Likud, by contrast, focused on Ross quotes that were policy-oriented and not personal. They distributed interviews with Ross and articles he wrote in which he regretted not insisting upon reciprocity with the Palestinians as Netanyahu had advised him.
“Rather than trying to resolve issues like Jerusalem and refugees, we would have focused on expanding the scope of Palestinian independence from Israeli control, developing and investing in the Palestinian economy, and expanding the connections between the Israeli and Palestinian societies,” Ross wrote in The Wall Street Journal in June 2007, sounding very much like Netanyahu’s current “economic peace” diplomatic plan.
How the new prime minister of Israel will work with the Obama administration is playing a big role in the election propoganda.
Likud officials said they hoped Kadima would continue to portray Netanyahu as someone who would have a difficult relationship with the Obama administration, because they believe this would help Netanyahu win more support among the public. Both Kadima and Labor have already started warning that Netanyahu would have an adversarial relationship with Obama, according to Hoffman.
“Whoever thinks that it will be easy for Israel with Netanyahu as prime minister is wrong,” Welfare and Social Services Minister Isaac Herzog told Army Radio on Friday. “It will be hard because it seems that Netanyahu’s policies will be in direct contrast with those of Obama.”
So while Americans can now relax in the knowledge that the election is over and Obama is firmly ensconced in the White House, here in Israel, the charismatic leader is still smack in the middle of the election campaign.
Helping Israel While You Waste Time
There are some people (lots, actually) who really get into role-playing fantasy type games – nowadays, mostly online. They’re a waste of time, as far as I’m concerned. These are the same people who like thrill rides at amusement parks, I have noticed. Not me; I can’t be bothered with online games (who has time?) and for me, just driving down the highway is enough of a thrill ride!
But helping spread Israel’s message online is something I always have time for. And believe it or not, I discovered an online game that does exactly that! It’s called PMOG, “The Passively Multiplayer Online Game.” Basically, you take on “missions” that entail your surfing through internet in a guided format. The author of a mission assembles web site s/he wants to introduce people to, and you get points for visiting. You can also lay mines at sites, which explode (the screen shakes a little) when a fellow PMOGer surfs to the site (they lose points, too). You can also “leave some love,” ie points, for someone to pick up at the site. There are also associations, merit badges, weapons, defensive measures, etc. – all the “tools of the trade” that you would find on a fantasy game site, except this one takes place all over the internet.
The Israel connection in PMOG comes with the missions members can organize and leave for others. PMOG users who take missions (for which they earn points) are directed to sites by the mission organizers, the idea being that they discover sites – and information – they might not have known. A few enterprising people have built Israel missions. One, called “Israel media,” took me to sites like the Israel Internet Statistics, and a couple of pages about anti-Israel bias in the media. Another mission is sort of an Israel travelogue, taking users to sites describing sites in Israel.
Most of the missions in PMOG, it should be noted, are “fun” missions, like “Wizards and other Magical Beings,” “National Peanut Butter Day,” “Ukeleles,” etc. Of course, a game is supposed to be fun – but this one is educational, too. Why not some missions on Israeli medical advances, or hi-tech stories (I’ve got a couple I could contribute!). PMOG could be an interesting educational tool!
Foto Friday – Sharon Bareket’s redheads squint in the hot noonday sun
Mention red hair and most people will think of Ireland or Scotland. And indeed, those two countries have the highest per capita number of redheaded people. But Israel, too, has its share of fair-skinned Gingers — and that’s not counting the extraordinary number of Israeli women who favor fluorescent orange over blonde from the bottle.
Photographer Sharon Bareket’s new exhibit, entitled Melano-Mental Photography – Touches of Light/Skin, at the Tavi Dresdner Gallery in Tel Aviv’s funky Neve Tzedek neighborhood, is a series of large-format images of red-heads – from strawberry blonde to vibrant titian – squinting and sweltering in the hot Mediterranean sun. Which begs the question, what are these people doing here?
“The light skin, the translucent eyelashes, the sun-blinded gaze, eyes all but closed, demarcates a closed circle, loaded with painful meaning in the political, cultural, linguistic and erotic contexts,” writes Doron Rabina in the gallery notes.
The photos are about Israeli identity: the people in the pictures are native-born sabras yet they appear as aliens in their surroundings.
But pity not the poor redhead! The photos do not take into account the fiery temperament that characterizes them; throughout the ages, from King David to Boudica, Queen Elizabeth I to Thomas Jefferson, there have been red-haired heroes.
Maybe what Israel needs right now is a redhead to lead us, though there doesn’t seem to be one coming up in time for the February elections.
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