Olmert’s E-Mail
If you’ve been reading Israel-related news then you know that Israel’s Prime Minister Olmert is under the magnifying glass at the moment for allegedly accepting money from a certain “financier” aka Morris the laundryman Talansky.
Accordingly, our friend Jameel at The Muqata writes…
———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Ehud Olmert
Subject: urgent
To: Jameel Rashid
From: PM Ehud Olmert
Greetings from Jerusalem
Before I introduce myself, I wish to inform you that this letter is not a hoax mail and I urge you to treat it serious. We want to transfer to overseas account (30,000.000 NIS) Thirty million New Israeli Shekels from a prime Bank here in Israel. I want to ask you, if you are not capable to quietly look for reliable and honest person who will be capable and fit to provide either an existing bank account or to set up a new Bank a/c immediately to receive this money, even an empty a/c can serve to receive this money, as long as you will remain honest to me till the end for this important business trusting in you and believing in God that you will never let me down either now or in future.
I am PM Ehud Olmert, presently the Prime Minister of Israel. Potentially in the course of an audit next week, it will be discovered that I have a floating fund in an account opened in the bank in 1990, in which I regularly deposited envelopes full of cash. I discovered that with the audit next week, if I do not get this money out urgently it will be forfeited for nothing.
The official owner of this account is my wife Aliza, a great artist and a resident of Jerusalem, who unfortunately never had any art skills, and it shows it what she produces.
While we would have claimed that the deposits were for artwork, no one believes that any more, as who would actually by her crap. No other person knows about this account or anything concerning it – yet.
The total amount involved is Thirty million New Israeli Shekels only [30,000.000.00 NIS] and we wish to transfer this money into safe foreigners account abroad. But while I know many foreigners who give me money, I don’t know any foreigner who will keep their mouth shut. . .
Nice one. Go to the Muqata for the rest…
Japanese Hotel d’De Niro
Filed under: Business, Life, Pop Culture, Profiles
A $178 million Japanese style hotel in Herzeliya with actor Robert De Niro’s backing? Yeah sure. Why not?
But what do Bobby, Japan and hotels have to do with one another? Ummmm….
According to this story…
In a lavish event held last Thursday at the Nobu sushi restaurant in London, the Nobu Group partners announced the establishment of a new hotel in Herzliya for an investment of NIS 600 million (approximately $178 million.)
Partners Robert De Niro and his son Raphael, due to attend, were absent. Attending the event were Chef Nobu Matsuhisa as well as the former-Israeli partners Meir Teper and Richie Notar and the Israeli partners in the project – the Strauss family and the Tidhar Group. Also joining the event were Paris Hilton and her beau.
The hotel will open its gates within two years and will feature 225 rooms. According to Sales Director, Sigal Ben-Moshe, all rooms will be available for purchase from $600,000 for a studio to $1.7 million for a penthouse. The sales concept is that the property owner will receive an annual refund of up to 5% and additional percentage from the project’s profits.
The Herzliya hotel will be built in Japanese-style architecture, featuring a large SPA club designed to provide business people with a relaxing, innovative meeting place.
Puuurrrrfect. Shall we be expecting Robert and Paris‘ at the grand opening?
Sleeping With the “Enemy”
Filed under: Blogging, Life, Politics, Pop Culture, War
A meeting of the minds, you say? How’s about starting with the bodies first?
There is NOTHING I can possibly add to this story about the joint Israeli-Arab “Amateur Adult Entertainment” website, Parpar 1. DISCLAIMER: BEFORE CLICKING PLEASE NOTE: THE SITE IS VERY GRAPHIC. LADIES & GENTLEMEN, IT’S PORN.
A short from a colleague’s take on the same story:
It’s not exactly sleeping with the enemy – very little actual slumber seems to be involved – but an Israeli Internet site has found a unique way to make Arabs and Jews come together in friendly – very friendly – relations.
Bringing people together in a way the politicians and peace plans have so far failed to do, the website, entitled Parpar 1, features 325 Israelis and Arabs engaging in “Middle East amateur porn.”
The site features such movies as “sex in the army,” “Amal and Rachel,” “the rabbi’s daughter,” “army power,” and “Israeli breakfast,” although it is doubtful whether this last features eggs,
cheese and diced salad served up in the traditional way.The site was set up in 2000, by two Israelis, one of whom, Shay Malol, confessed Tuesday that in so doing he was fulfilling a childhood dream.
Shay: Maybe you should’ve found some sort of hobby as a kid. Oops..looks like you did.
Travelin’ Tuesday
Filed under: Blogging, Holidays, Israeliness, Travel
It’s Israel’s 60th birthday. The entire year.
Which means mucho travelers in and out of the country all annum.
Which means mucho interest in the “what’s going on and what should I do?” finer aspects of travel planning for locals and non-locals.
Which means that we at Israelity see a need. And we are here to heed.
(Feechs. Was that Cheez-Whiz on a stale Grissini or what?)
Without further Ado: We’ve got Foto Fridays, Nostalgia Sundays and now you can tune in to weekly Travelin’ Tuesdays here at Israelity to get your “travel on”.
We’ll list off-the-beaten-path getaways, trendy eateries, hot nighttime action venues, happenings, festivals…you name it.
And readers, this is an interactive kinda thing. Which means we want to hear from you.
Found the ultimate Scuba dive club and reef in Eilat and think others might want to know? Weekended in a charming Golan Heights B&B with a killer view and complimentary silk bathrobes? Excursioned by jeep to Petra, slept in the open desert and have to re-tell it? Found the only all-you-can-eat sushi place open at 2 a.m. in Beer Sheba?
Then walk those fingers over there to the right-hand column of this page and click on the “Contact Us” or “Contact Stephanie” button. Write your experience. Give as much detail (links, phone numbers, prices, etc) as possible. OR send links to your own blog or web entry. We’ll share and share alike.
Dust off the travel valise and get out the door.
It’s time to go!
No Sex
You know that old song from childhood: Swimming Swimming in the Swimming pool. When Days are Hot when Days are Cold, In the Swimming Pool…?
You know how you’re supposed to sing multiple rounds of the song and at each new round you cut out a lyric and mime the action so that by the time you reach the final round you’re humming and miming the entire way through?
This story about Israel’s billboard company wanting the word Sex removed from Sex & The City’s film promos in Israel reminds me of that song.
Except I’m sort of wondering how you’d mime the sex part.
On second thought, forget it. I don’t want to know.
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