Israel walks the line

January 26, 2009 - 7:02 PM by David · 2 Comments
Filed under: General, Israeliness, Life

numbers For a long time, there was no word for ’standing in line’ in Hebrew.

Just kidding, of course there was a word for it, it’s just that nobody actually stood in line. Nobody will actually stand behind you, they sort of sidle up next to you, as if they’re going to cut in front of you at the first available moment. Lines in Israel look more like trapezoids.

And never mind the people who come up behind you and say “I’m here behind you – I’m just going to do 10 errands and I’ll be right back.” These people alway have a knack of returning just after their turn was supposed to come and expect me to vouch for them, even though I’m done with my business and have one foot out the door.

In the last couple years though, a major innovation has rippled through the postal, government and health care systems – the number system! Everyone takes a number at the door and there’s no controversy, nobody holding someone else’s place, nobody arguing that they were ahead of you in line – right? Wrong.

Today at the neighborhood post office, the following scenario proves that Israelis can create havoc even out of an organized situation. Here’s the deal – lots of people are at the post office, one person who couldn’t wait any longer walked out, throwing his number into the trash can at the entrance.

A 20-something-year-old man who had just walked in, reaches in and picks up the discarded number, which is a couple dozen ahead of his own. A woman who sees the action going down and realizes Mr. 20-something is now ahead of her shouts out, “You can’t do that. I was here before you.”

“Sure I can,” he answered. “If the other guy had stayed, he’d still go ahead of you. What does it matter if it’s him or me?”

The woman didn’t like that response and approached one of the postal clerks – “Don’t receive this man – he’s cutting in line,” she yelled out. The clerk had no idea what she was talking about, but meanwhile, the other people in line all started weighing in with their opinions, some siding with Mr. 20 and some with the ruffled woman.

My wife, who relayed the story, was ahead of both of them, and walked out without getting to experience the final act. My bet is that just before it was Mr. 20’s found turn, someone ran up and said “I was here, I just went out to do 10 errands.”

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